tday before the day before christmas -part II

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

christmas

i don't really know whether i'm happy or sad.


i'm happy coz my grannies are here.
i'm happy coz i finished my christmas tree.
i'm happy coz all of us went strolling to Luneta tonight.
i'm happy coz i don't have any grudges.
i'm happy coz my sister mentioned in her blog that i know everyone.
i'm happy coz it's gonna be christmas.

but...

i'm sad coz the first 12 minutes of the animated movie UP made me cry. first. 12. minutes.
i'm sad coz i still hurt. (yes, may pakiramdam po ako)
i'm sad coz i got hungry tonight, and my feet swell.
i'm sad coz i'm alone.
and i'm sad coz it's gonna be christmas.

there's really something about christmas that makes me happy and sad all at the same time. i'm gonna find that out. gotta sleep now!

what the freakin' fruits happened to my blog???

7 days before CHRISTMAS :)

Friday, December 18, 2009

grannies

2 days ago, my grannies have come home.

happiness. i really miss them. the thought of having them near makes me happy. anyway, the other day, i combed my grandmother's hair so she can have her siesta, and i remembered doing it when i was still young. there was this one time when i got so bored of doing it and i just wanted to go out and play but she wouldn't let me, not unless she slept. so i just pretended combing her hair, rolling the comb all the way to her scalp. then the comb got stuck and i couldn't take it off, so i silently slipped out of their room, leaving her sleeping with her hair tangled on a comb.

i don't clearly remember what happened next. but i do remember i saw one neighbor chatting with her while trying to get the comb off her hair. and hearing that they would need to cut it made me so guilty. and that she didn't get mad at me.

btw, j's field trip was okay. i didn't like it. the whole time i felt sleepy and tired and bored. but i had to attend to her. the stage-sister that i am, to all my sibs. what really made my day was seeing the migratory birds (or migrant?) (--got me confused) along the rice swamps, whatever they call it. they were beautiful.

btw part 2, i am so grateful to be here on philippine soil for the holiday seasons. i just can't imagine myself being anywhere away from here. thank You po...

december 10th

Thursday, December 10, 2009

who'd have thought mankind would still see this day. or any other day, after some predictions that the world would end come year 2000. i used to believe that it would... that's why when i woke up this morning and realized there'll be 21 days left before year 2010, i knew i am blessed.


...then 3 days after that, i will be OLD.

when i was a kid, i told myself i'd be married at 25. not too young and not too old either to have a family of my own. then i turned 25. no-boyfriend-since-birth... then i'm gonna be 26, and next thing i knew, i'm greying and single... maybe that's why i'm suicidal at times ;) jk

it's past 12 noon, and i'm just about to start my day. have to prepare for j's field trip tomorrow. hope it turns out okay. and i hope i have the time to blog more. coz i want to remember my day-to-day thoughts... fb keeps me busy!

saturday

Saturday, October 24, 2009

lazy

i've been knocked out today. i don't know why i am so lazy and sleepy. it's 7.22 and i still haven't gotten up, just been on the net (after i woke up --again-- past 4)


i have just seen Mamma Mia! for the nth time. and still watching outtakes. i really love it. i think i am astounded by the idea that no matter how big Meryl is as a star, she can sing and dance and jump and fool around.

that's all.

it seems to me...

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

myself


like i really have a knack for job hunting!

i've been a training facilitator, computer tutor, field trip coordinator, hotel chambermaid, call center agent, call center unit manager, secretary, liaison officer, records officer, cashier, receptionist, sales representative, and a nanny.

true. oh my gosh i just realized how flexible i am. hahah! and now i'm back to square one. seriously, when will i realize which career path to trod?

i've always wanted to be a teacher. that's one job i SERIOUSLY think i wouldn't quit on. but i don't like studying. i've proved that since 1st grade. i love reading, i read encyclopedias cover to cover, but school books? it's a bore. i like quizzes though. but not recitations. i don't like it when the teacher calls me (coz i don't raise my hand!) to give the answer.

yes, i have been a nanny for a week, not by choice. worked on behalf of my aunt. her boss noticed my resume and quoted "she did a thousand jobs in a year!"

(*sigh*)

currently listening to iTunes. really soothing.

i went to Megamall today to meet a former friend. or colleague. w'ever. almost lost my patience when i couldn't find her (and she couldn't find me, either!) but when we have met finally, the stories poured out naturally (with a few cussings on the side)...

i was telling her to follow her heart, if she really wanted to stay here for good. of course, life here isn't easy, for the less fortunate like us, even though how beautiful we are. ;) but we shared the same sentiment -- which is, well -- life is short.

suppose you are the healthiest person alive, does that assure you that you'll be living til next month? that's my conviction. i don't want to waste my time away from the people i love.

i was there, i knew how it was to be aching for home. and no matter how much you make them happy by providing their whims and all, it doesn't make sense when you come home in a box. the days that you could have spent laughing with them, or fighting with them. or just by being there when any one of you needs someone to be there with.

i'm being sentimental.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

today i bought my VERY first monopoly board. i am the happiest. but the bus ride really almost gave me a heart attack. i really hate bus rides. i thought by now, i have overcome my fear finally, but no. still faint-hearted when the bus swerves suddenly or another bus comes like a flash beside ours.


that's all. when i am not sleepy, i might write a little longer than this one. :)

PHILIPPINES!!! (super delayed post)

Friday, August 28, 2009

Jared

HAHAH. i'm actually here! sometimes it's really hard to believe. like when i'm walking on the streets, and seeing the stars... strolling on the mall, and seeing jeepneys outside! seeing filipinos all around me. feels so good to be here.

it's not like i've been gone for more than 5 years... but still, nothing compares to my own country. although it's crazy most of the time, i'm still proud of it.

so i came here last august 7... on a rainy day, like the last time. and spent my week preparing for jared's birthday. but i couldn't see him yet because of the flu scare. and his birthday came by, successfully, with my brother's help, and mom also ;) it was fun, and it was fun for me too because i always liked organizing parties.




blogging from my lola's kitchen

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Philippines

listening to Celine's ALL BY MYSELF :)


i'm really all by myself right now, coz they are asleep already, and my brother's outside with his friends. it's wednesday, and if there was ever a time when i feel like time is moving so s-l-o-w, this must be one of those. must be favorable, but i'm just really bored.

i have always been anticipating about this for so long, and now it's happened, i know i am happy. but i want to go home. but i love being with my grannies. i love spoiling them.

(it's all coming back to me ... now...)

pwede? (sigh)

so i've been here in the Philippines 12 days and so many thing has happened.

interesting day...

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Bahrain

i got people asking me WHY?


to begin with, i resigned last Monday, with all the best intentions in mind. (kidding)

so when the news came out that i REALLY was going home (coz i have been telling them, but they won't believe) all i got was WHY?! you have a nice life here, it's better here than in the philippines. and a whole lot of speculations, one of which, of course, is the unending tale that i am pregnant (how i wish i were), which sometimes go down to i will be having an abortion. crazy, right? that's how it is here in bahrain. i thought gossiping was filipino's past time, how'd you guess other nationalities do best? or worse? (whaev)

so i had a list of REASON WHY. and WHY SO SOON, two-page enumeration of those two. well, it saved my time and sweet saliva.

i had men actually threatening to hunt me down in the philippines, when i don't wanna give them my address and number (like, why?!) and one boy (okay, a man who acts like a little boy) ho actually cried. oh i broke his heart :( poor thing.

kristelle pringles

Monday, July 13, 2009

food

today... i officially changed my last name to PRINGLES. ;P


it's because i always eat pringles, like almost daily, and i don't like carrying this last name of mine after all....

Kristelle Pringles... sweetness!

best friends?

Friday, July 10, 2009

Bahrain

i can't think of a better title.


it's past 2 a.m. and i am just about to sleep. i just finished making my chicken macaroni salad (painstaking!) and jellies for a friend's birthday tomorrow. i just thought that since she's away from her family, i'd try to make her happy even just a tiny-teeny bit (whatever that is).

so i got home 10.30, because my friends and i went to Marina mall after (my) work to have dinner, which i barely touched (coz i'm sad for a reason). and then tried to help another friend look for a decent white dress... i was wondering, really, how and why i met this one! she's a heartbreak. her life, and her present job, and she's helpless. i know i have problems of my own but i just feel like helping her the best i can.

so, after tiring myself from walking around the mall, (back and forth the racks and fitting room --like a mother!) i finally got home and hurriedly ran to the nearby cold store to get the ingredients we don't have. when i got i the store, the cashier introduced me to their new help, by saying "this is my best friend" ... of course i was polite and said hi back, but my mind was asking "since when have we became best of friends?"

i mean, i don't even know her name! hahaha... yeah, i go there, we spend time talking, but best friend? no worries, she's not gonna read this. i'm just surprised that somebody actually considered me her best friend. it takes a long time for me to consider somebody my best friend, so... there.

and a best friend for me, is someone who knows you inside out, and accepts you for who you are. and is there in good AND bad times. maybe i have high standards, and also being possessive, makes it hard for me to find one here in Bahrain. anyway it's not like a requirement.

and before i forget... last night, while waiting for the pedestrian to clear between Seef mall and the parking lot, i was talking to my friend, and a car stopped so we could cross. and oh my god, it was a Ferrari in front of me! i mean, i have seen one before, but it was gliding with the Porsche. nothing i just wanna make a blog note.

one year anniversary...

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Bahrain

imagine... one year na ako sa Bahrain? i thought i wouldn't last this long.


Economic Crisis and Global Warming prodded me to stay... ;-)

i'm planning to go home on August. i hope it comes true. i really don't like it here anymore. nor the way i am...

i don't know if i actually losing or gaining weight. i go hungry most of the times, so my face is a little haunched, but i eat so much at applebee's or chili's (or macaroni grill) that i always feel bloated! what's with me? i don't want to be too much fat, nor thin. but i love eating. moderately if i can help it.

notice...


...july 02, 2008 - july (almost) 02, 2009

i have new friends, and i like hanging out with them, but i believe in the saying "familiarity breeds contempt", so i'll be a little reserved. although -- i'm happy that some people who once snubbed me because of some tattletale about me a colleague spreaded, are actually coming to me now, making friends with me.

that's why i believe that -- let me rephrase that -- i STRONGLY believe that vindication is better than revenge. as long as i don't and didn't do anything wrong to anyone, i will not stoop down to anyone's low standards...

MICHAEL JACKSON died! i remember writing on my journal earlier this year about the dreams that i had... one was that a famous singer will die. next is that most plane crash will be caused by storms. it's happened. last summer, i told my former officemate that she will be pregnant this year, (i saw it in my dreams) and last night, they told me that she was, and she was blaming me? imagine?

so i have to sleep. hoho's in guimaras now. envy.

heartbreak

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

books

so i just finished reading this book, which is a collection of heartbreaking stories...


here i go again. i mean, the critic in me...

first, there was an introduction. it was a loooooooooooong, boring, not heartbreaking kind of introduction. it will drain half of your reading powers. but i happen to want to read every word from cover to cover, or else, i wouldn't consider the book read.


first chapter... sometimes the ears don't fit... by CARLITOS JOE (sounds like lang!)

so it was told using the first person narration. i have a good body. men fantasize about me... what?! is this man a she? and why does she always brag about her nice physique, and everything she has achieved, followed by i am not bragging here. (it was mentioned, like, 3 or more times!) of course it wasn't a she. but seriously, if the author's name is of a man's and he uses the first person for his story, it's creepy! especially if it started of with at least i am not doing *lowjobs... he could have introduced his character first!


second chapter... i forgot the title... by CHINKY LABRADOR (sounds like na lang din!)

this is one author i most likely will not want to encounter again. punctuations, girl. 

there was a sentence there which goes like this:

mustering a smile while willing the supermarket's unflattering fluorescent lights to beam the woman up to wherever pink plastic hair rollers went to die.

talk about long. and senseless. 

and the woman there was described as Sunflowers-by-Elizabeth-Arden-reeking lady.

and she likes adjectives.

kitschy writing
day-glo box
scratchy sound system
part and parcel of the sad plight (not nice to put them together)
macrobiotic girl

if you happen to read an adjective or two before every noun, you'll feel sad too :(


third chapter... by JONATHAN S.

"3 boxes of facial tissue she is carrying drop to the grocery floor."

...ikaw na bahala mag-hanap ng mali. walang proof-reader?


fourth chapter... letters to joaquin... by E.C. de los Reyes

if you happen to be having a bad day. or a heartbreak, don't read this.

because it really hurts. 

10 short chapters, 13 pages of heart-rending words... all of which i could almost taste in my mouth! sobrang naka-relate daw ako? 

phrases like:

...how casually you break my heart
...throw away the words because i can't bear to keep them
...(cleaning the house when i'm hurting!)
...what-the-****-did-i-do-to-deserve-this moments
...save the words for another savage day

okay i wrote enough. too much in fact.

last chapter::: the electronic journal of Ana Banana... by Sally Magdiwang

this is funny. the thought was heart-breaking, but the story was comical.

she uses phrases like:

"eight year drought is starting to dig cracks on my uteral lining" LOL!
and:

"what's worse, the hotel sits right in front of a hospital where, you know, a lot of people DIE. Four stars my ass." (the last sentence was higlighted by Sharie, the 14-year-old owner of this book and beside it wrote: "WHEE! THAT SOUNDS COOL!!! =D)

that's it. just be prepared before reading this little book. because it's not a light-reader's choice. words will be pouring out to you, though you don't have time for them. words like: rankle, digress, farce, burgeoned into rabid obsession, vacillate, groused, shimmied her hips, and labyrinthine maze...

Friday, June 05, 2009

food

I think my brain isn't normal today. after browsing the Gulf Daily News from cover to cover, I flipped into the Take A Break section to kill time.


One look, and I got the scrambled word arranged on my mind! and when I tried to put up some words that I can make from the word ENIGMATIC, out of the 38 quota, I got 46!

And for the very first time, I finished the crossword! (not the cryptic!)

And... I got 3 of 4 answers right from the quick quiz! It's a quiz that's quick enough -- to read. Coz the questions are tough! Anyway, they didn't say it was an easy, quick quiz right?

And the most amazing thing... I finished the DIFFICULT SUDOKU in less than 20 minutes! When I take more than 30 on EASY and FIENDY!

So imagine my surprise when I looked at the page all full of my writings! :)

I forgot to mention that the lasagna I ate last Sunday night was bland. I mean, maybe for others it is something. But I am not a fan of feta cheese, and it was oozing with feta cheese! so forget about coming back.

Last night, before heading to Irish's flat, we had dinner at TGIF. I haven't tried eating ribs before, because as I see it, it was just bones. A little piece of meat maybe, but really, it's a little expensive (in the Phils!) to eat those little meat! So last night, I tried Friday's special.

And to my surprise, it was not little. But it didn't meet my expectation. I liked the hush puppies though...

p.s. i like yellow

are you happy?

Monday, June 01, 2009

Bahrain

our company driver asked this of me while on the way home. of course, i thought about it thoroughly before i answered......

"no, im not happy" (remembering Mr. Incredible's conversation with his boss: "i'm not happy bob...")

and i was reprimanded! "you should be happy. God gave you all. why are you not happy?"

eh sa hindi nga ako masaya eh...

Of course I AM grateful for all my faculties. i am always thankful for my voice which i use to sing for Him, praise Him... and converse with people. for having complete sets of body parts, (and teeth!) and my eyes, and everything...

but as of now, living and working 4,576 miles from home, how can I possibly be happy?

but of course I can't tell that to him! it's just hard. conversing... :D

sleeping over now at irish's flat. i had a lasagna dinner at macaroni grill, which just opened their bahrain branch 3 or 4 days ago. it was bland. or i just can't reach the pepper coz the table was so wide! their table top was covered with white sheet of paper, and beside the condiments, were crayons.

very creative. of course if they out on something like that, the customers won't notice (so much) that they've been waiting for almost an hour for their food. and when the food has finally been served, you can spill sauce anywhere, anytime you like. coz it'll be your doodles (or drawings if you're much of an artist) you'll be staining, not the table cloth.

we've had few dips on the (cool and salty) pool... and now we're ready to hit the sack. nytnyt.

moments

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

book

"yung mga ganung monument winiwish mo na kerri mo lang ibulsa o itiklop tapos i-josok sa wallet na parang picturraka na pwedeng silip-silipin kung kelan mo bet. kasi hindi mo ma-getching kung bakit yung isang bagay na pagka-simple simple e punung-puno ng kahulugan. yun yung mga monument na gustung-gusto mo sanang patagalin."

-wanda ilusyunada

interpretation in human language:

...these are the moments that you often wish you could put inside your pocket, 
or fold and insert inside your wallet, like a picture that you can glimpse 
at anytime you like. because you will never understand why that most 
simple thing can be full of meaning. 
those are the moments you wish could last a little longer...

true.

baby P and grandma Amelia

Sunday, May 24, 2009

blogging

i've read the articles about them on the periodical today, as my routine is always the same - house, pass by a cold store to buy iced tea, work, get the periodicals, sit, and read. i'd be glad to finish the sudoku on it, coz that's just what i do -- sit.


i have been close to my grandma, because she was the one who's seen us grow. although she wasn't as doting as a normal one would be, she would always ensure our well-being. she wasn't the demonstrative type who'd hug and spoon-feed you. but i love her just the way she is. if she were a little different, we would have grown SPOILED BRATS. i'm sure. i can say we are spoiled, but we aren't brats. if she would succumb to our whining, we really will not be the way we are today. 

modesty aside, my siblings and i, as far as i can say, we were humbled by our childhood. not much privileges of a normal child whose parents were both abroad, not much new toys or nice school things because our grandma prefers Baclaran than SM! but by that, she has established in us a simple way of living. not too pompous, and not boastful. i can almost imagine how boastful my brothers would be if they were given all the good toys? kids are like that... and we appreciate every little luxury that comes our way. because our grandma taught us that.

maybe that's the reason why i have a big heart for the elderly. i know my brothers do too, as they tell me if they see an old person and they feel pity if he/she looks weary. and that's why i was touched by grandma Amelia's story. she was a blogger, (yeah i was shocked, too) 95-year-old blogger. telling her life before the people, inspiring and encouraging with every single day she has lived to tell. and now she's gone. she logged off for the last time. she has lived her life to the fullest. and she had been given the time to tell it.

the other person on my title is the complete opposite... really heartbreaking to tell. he's a 17-month old baby. ruthlessly abused by his mother, and her beau. HE WAS JUST 17-MONTHS. he doesn't know how it was to be angry. kids, are forgiving. do all you want to do to them, but they will still love to have your hug. he doesn't know how the world worked. how cruel some people are, and unfortunately for him, he was living with two of them under the same roof. but he does know how to love. and no one he loved gave him back the same.

he lived only for 17 months. he wouldn't be seen biking, wooing girls, getting married, and become old. he wouldn't be heard singing, or even be introduced to cellphone! he will never know the internet. and he couldn't make a blog anymore, just like grandma Amelia... yet he touched lives. only the painful way...

i feel so terrible. not for him, but because of him.

this brought me a thought. young or old. happy or sad. in agony or in waiting... all of us will go one day. what have we left behind? all our riches, all the fame, all the things of this world will just pass away. years will come, and all that's left are memories. memories of the happy days, and some sad. why not make it each day worthwhile? one really never knows what tomorrow will bring. only God knows.

BIA

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

airplane

here now at the Bahrain International Airport. waiting for the boarding time. some of the people are sleeping. it's 11 pm, so i hope also i can sleep on the plane. 


i'm sure we'll be running after the sun AGAIN like my plane had last time. it was 9 pm already on my watch, and the sun was still up. 11 pm i checked outside again, and the sun was still up! although it was setting, it just went out of our sight when we were descending.

so now, i'm sure in a matter of an hour, there'll be sunlight outside.

i can see the plane from here. i hope i can sit now so i'll start to sleep. it's a direct flight so no hassle.

no time to be excited...

Monday, April 27, 2009

i am going to the Philippines. i think?


my flight is tonight half past 12 midnight. but as of now, i haven't packed! i don't have a suitcase yet coz my sister brought mine, so i had to borrow from my friend. which i will get later. i know thal might read this, so thanks in advance crystal! you're my unofficial best friend in Bahrain! (unofficial coz we both have our own best friends already ;))

so anyway. the reason why i don't have time to get excited is because everything happened so fast. it's just Monday, and I can't believe it was just last Thursday that I was at the office telling them of my decision. even my sister freaked out when i told her i resigned. of course, it wasn't an easy decision to make. but it's like chosing my job against my conviction. and my heart ached every single day thinking about the general conference that i will not be able to see.

i wanted so much to worship. it's like, fighting for your soul. papayag ba akong maiwan sa rapture? 'course not. and God helped me ALL the way. it's funny when the BIBLE scriptures we were just reading and memorizing before in Sunday School applied to me today. "Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and ALL these things shall be added unto you" it didn't say just SOME. it said ALL. and it was true. 

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Bahrain

i woke up in a yellow world. it was very yellow outside and i thought it was just the window tint. some effects. but when i went to the bathroom where the window was open and evrything was yellow, i knew i had to ask before i freak out that i'm color blind except for yellow.


sandstorm lang pala... after an hour, back to normal ang kulay ng room. but when i went outside (where i had to walk to the end of the street coz the car can't go inside our street coz of road construction) the other buildings weren't visible because of the thick dust and sand.

i hate sandstorm. my head was aching all day coz dust gathered in my contact lens. how was i supposed to know it would hurt that much?

of chain mails and books

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

books

i always receive these chain mails, from messages about my horoscope  to dying children, which all states usually at the last line of the message that you will get blank days of bad luck if you don't forward it to a number of friends, or a promise of something good to happen to you tomorrow (like they were sure you'd still be alive tomorrow) if you forward it. the number of years of your good/bad luck depends on how many people you send it to. one message even promises of a ghost to visit you tonight if you don't share the ghost's story to all your contacts. (like the ghost monitors all the people who have received and read that *adjective here* message)


oh well. as usual, and as always, and as i would normally do, i get on with reading my other mails than take my time to tick all my contacts' name on the address book, knowing that i will be sparing them the fear and anxiousness of having blank years of bad luck if they don't forward that *adjective here* message. here's the thing, tonight, i just deleted a message which proudly told me that i will get 24 years of bad luck. so i will be 49 by the time my years of bad luck will finish. do i care? as long as God is with me, no mail will predict my luck. besides my pastor told us before that there's no such thing as luck. so good luck to all who forwards chain mails (haha--kidding!)



so i just finished reading the book entitled The Lost Boy... and at first i was teary-eyed reading his experience. i can somehow relate. i mean, i haven't been abused or tortured, but being hungry for his parents' love. and i have two brothers that i'm protective of (though they resent it) i don't want anybody to hurt or abuse them, like what happened to this child. so while i read this boy's misery under her own mother's abusive nature, i feel my heart ache. but half-way through the story, i realized that it was somehow wrong. he has grown. but his story went on.

okay. i am not a critic. and i am not judging this man. but to be beaten by his mother, while her other brothers enjoy the privilege of being a human being, he must have done something wrong. his father was there and his mother still hurt him, meaning his father is consenting on his mother's actions, must mean she doesn't do it just because she wants to, right?

i am a woman. i might be a mother someday, or not. okay, let's put it this way. i am human. and as human, i commit mistakes. and his mother must have reasons for her actions. why would she drink too much in the first place? (coz there was a conclusion that said maybe it was chemical imbalance from her drunkenness which caused her to beat him or hurt him) there are always two sides of the story. and him writing against his own mother doesn't make him any different from the Mother and her judgement and cruelty. he has written against her. he should have had the decency of letting other people put her mother down.

and all his actions while he was growing up only made me believe more that he was doing something wrong and his mother was right for punishing him. if he were a good boy, and his mother just beat him just because she wants to, after he left the House, he would have been a good boy. right? but, no. he would always get himself into trouble. and would do things he knew wasn't right. he stole, and justifying his deed through his books, repeatingly stating he was a confused boy. if a confused boy is a good boy but just confused, he still will not steal. that's my opinion. i don't know the man, i'm just stating my opinion. i wasn't abused when i was a child, but i knew how it was to grow up without proper guidance from my own parents. but i didn't rebel against my better judgement. i'm not judging him, i promise. i'm just writing down my opinion. on my page.

bottom-line is, he has grown. his story should have had ended at the time the social workers helped him out of his then hellish house. he was found already at that point. but it went on. the title should have been the boy who got himself lost because he wouldn't listen to the elderly but follows his instinct judging from his past, defensively carrying out actions because he thinks he is lost. 

no judgement.

skins...

Sunday, January 18, 2009

i checked my blog entry and i can't believe i said SKINS! MY SKINS!!!


9 days after i posted it! i just checked it and it was horrifying! (exaggeration at my best)

my sister and i (and her beibi) went to Bahrain City Centre yesterday. and we were looking inside every shop coz we hardly have the time to go out a lot. and i am in dire need of a planner! my gosh sa pilipinas, ilan-ilan ang planner na pinamimigay, mula sa mga printing press, book shops, hanggang sa Mama Sita's meron! now January's almost over and i still don't have one!

and after tiring meself, di pa rin pala ako nakabili... yun lang.

the dawn of the 8th.

Thursday, January 08, 2009

i can't sleep. i have these itchy rashes lately that just come as fast as they would go. parang chinese inscriptions on my skins, parang kinalmot na nagpantal and i don't understand why i get them. naliligo na ako sa calamine!


something interesting happened today. i got an offer to sing in a lounge at a certain hotel. and i like to sing, more than anything else. music is on the top of my list of likes. (next is reading materials)

so i invited my friend if we can check out the place. it was a nice hotel. and it was a nice lounge. well-lit, not too crowded, cozy and a little sophisticated. so, of course, i had to see myself if i can sing there. but i remembered gladys guevarra, and how she performs on stage, how she sings, and i wanted to be like her. very confident and very, very good.

but i can't do it. i had to consider so many things before grabbing that tempting opportunity. first is my spirituality. i can't sing in the church if i'm gonna sing there. you can't walk with God, and run with the devil...

next is my present job. although the owner is offering it as a part-time job for me, (and believe me, the rate is higher than my present job, for only 4 days a week!) i have to be considerate to my present job, may term dun e, kaso i forgot... it's 3.28 am, mind you.

and many other things. so as much as i love to sing, and be even a little like gladys, i have to turn it down... i'm contented watching gladys guevarra do her act.

speaking of gladys, she remembers me now :) but she's nicer on e-mails.

I am 25...

Monday, January 05, 2009

birthday

:(


i'm not happy. it wasn't a happy birthday at all...

although... i really appreciate lahat ng bumati sa akin... whether it be through SMS, friendster comment, and personal greeting... and for the gifts. yung iba, material, yung iba gift of friendship. i really appreciate it.

but i'm not happy talaga. i am so disappointed. but still, thank you po Jesus, kasi i am alive. naabutan ko pa ang 25th birthday ko, despite all the hardships di ba? and all the paranoia.

hay... let's begin the silver year. whatever is in store for me, God only knows.....

2009...

Friday, January 02, 2009

Gladys

has begun. and i'm home alone. the family went over to some friends' house, and i don't feel like going out today so i opted to stay home.


i'm watching gladys guevarra's videos on youtube. and the more i watch her, the more i like her. she's very talented. and she sings very well. so well, in fact i believe she can surpass regine velasquez, given a chance. she belts out high notes without so much effort, and one comment even says that she really is singing, not shouting like some other singers, which obviously is, um, ok i won't mention the name.

on PBB, she said something that i really believe in, and would stand for. "you are the captain of your own ship..." (...the chu-chu of your own soul -- haha hindi ko din alam!) and that is the fact. no matter what most people think or say about you, at the end of the day, you will be left responsible for your decisions, and not them. so if you will value their opinion, and not following your own instinct, or your own judgment, when the time comes that you realized it was a mistake, you got no one else to blame but you. AND no one else will suffer the consequences, but you.

if you think about every decision you will make so hard, but so carefully, even if it turns out to be a mistake, you will have no regrets. because you know you chose well. you have chosen what will make you happy for the day.

before, when i was asked if i have any regrets in life, my answer was none. because i chose what will make me happy. if it entailed some hardships, i will still stand by my decision, because i chose it. i was happy with it. and the troubles it entailed were out of my control. and i really wouldn't have it any other way. i have become what i am today, because of my decisions, and if i i had opted the "other choice" i don't think i will like the person i would have been.

so back to gladys... i really like her voice (one of her many talents) and self-confidence.... and complexion. ;) i wish i could meet her.